As 2016 comes to a close, I can’t help but look back on the last 12 months and think about the good times and the bad times, the ups and the downs, why this is what everyone does at the close of a year, right? We all want to see what goals we hit and crushed and where we fell short. Where did 2016 stack up for you? Did you achieve everything you wanted or do you feel like you never reached your peak?
Being an avid goal setter and to do list creator, I have to say I am pretty hard on myself. I am upset with myself if I don’t cross off every line on my to do list, or if I did not finish a project on time. Frankly, I am too much of a perfectionist and too Type A for my own good. This leads me to how I fell short last year and how I really want to make some serious changes in the New Year. I mean you can’t do the same things all over again and expect a different outcome right?
I honestly have to say 2016 was not a perfect year by any means, in fact it was down right tough. There were many struggles I went through. I dealt with several health issues including thyroid issues, hormone issues, fatigue symptoms, and weight gain. It is not easy trying to build a media empire and feeling lethargic, let alone gaining 15 extra pounds and adding that to the 10 extra pounds the camera already gives you! Thank you technology and HD cameras! It is frustrating when you spent your entire life as an athlete, in shape and able to whip your body into a lean mean machine in a few weeks time. Then you wake up to a body that you do not recognize, and no matter what you do, nothing is working.
I went through quite a bit of personal struggles this year with my relationships and with friends that I thought were (lets just use the word “solid” in my life), only to learn they were not true friends. This can really rock you to the core if you let it, and there were many times I agonized over these relationships and how I would miss having these people in my life. It kept me up at night thinking about why this happened to me and how I could have been so wrong in my judgment of these so called friends.
I also struggled with focus and it not being 100% on my business, which sounds crazy but as an entrepreneur, your focus in pulled in so many different directions, you tend to have days where your brain just has too many tabs open. If only we could shut them down one at a time like on your smartphone! I was worried about what everyone else was doing and trying to bend over backwards to help everyone that I could and in essence, I neglected myself.
I was burning the candle at both ends and never taking the time to recharge my battery. Frankly, by August, I was at my wits end. There were many times I thought about quitting what I was doing and taking a few months off to see where my happiness was. I had to literally peel myself off the floor some days. Oh if it wasn’t for my wine, I think I might not have made it through. Thank God for the wine!
The thing is, I am a very positive person and live with the mantra “DREAM BIG!” I know that I can accomplish anything I set my mind too even if it takes several failures to get there. The thing is and the space that I really fell short in last year, was the journey of how to get to my goals. I was doing it all wrong. I wasn’t enjoying the journey at all. I was stressed out, overthinking everything, never stopping to appreciate the small wins and accomplishments I was having along the way. For example, instead of looking at an episode of our show and saying, wow, the production of this episode was stellar, I was picking it apart. I would think, wow the camera angle on me is not flattering, or I don’t like the Jib shot on this episode or we should have done this differently. Type A all the way.
I was robbing myself of the happiness and balance of work and pleasure. I was 100% work and not taking enough time to rest and relax. I was overcommitted and doing too much to accommodate everyone else but myself. You know how it is, your calendar is packed every week and you can’t believe how much you committed too. It’s like, how does this happen week after week? Me being the “I say I will be there and so I will” type of person, I would never cancel on anyone, and even if I was feeling exhausted, I still showed up! Put on that make up and a smile and get outta the house, right? The funny thing is I realized that not everyone is like this, and there is a small percentage of people that will do the same for you. Let’s face it when things get tough, you really see who is in your corner.
Ok so enough about what went wrong last year and let’s move on to the fact that I did have a great year and lots of success in 2016. I did hit several of my goals and most importantly I learned quite a bit about myself and my business and what I want to do differently to CRUSH it in 2017.
1.) First and foremost, I will be Focusing 100% on my business and not letting anyone get in my way of pulling my focus in the wrong direction. “Stop Interrupting my grinding” (Beyonce said it best!) These people are called speed bumps, and they slow you down with negativity, complaining about their problems, and everything else in between. They dump on you and drain you like a vampire. What do you do, unfriend them on Facebook, unfollow them on social media, and take them outta your phone. Pull the kill switch on this relationship and I swear you will feel 10 lbs lighter. Trust me I have done it and I haven’t looked back. Surround yourself with those people that really motivate you and make you feel good about yourself. Create your tribe and push each other up to the next level!
2.) Stop trolling social media 24/7 and focusing so much on what everyone else is doing. FOMO is real right, and everyone is living a perfect filtered life. NOT! Everyone is on there showing their best pictures and parts of their days. It can make you feel like your not good enough, but honestly, everyone is fighting a battle, they are just not posting about it. Everyone has a crap day! I am going on social media only certain times of the day now so I can be 100% focused on what I want to get done each day and not get side tracked by the drama or sucked into the time suck highway. People we have empires to build!!
An imperfect moment my hair was tangled in the back and the lady that took this picture was laughing with us!
3.) Working on making my time for fitness and putting myself first. I spent many days in 2016 not having the time to work out and not feeling good about myself. I overcommitted to things then my own personal time got sacrificed in the process which made me unhappy and resentful. Not happening this year. I am penciling in my workouts in the calendar and making sure I make time to do at least 10k steps a day. Let’s face it, we are all happier when we spend some quality me time. This also goes along with mediation time, reading time, getting my nails did time, whatever I want to do for myself to take care of ME!
4.) Stop with the perfectionism because no one is perfect and frankly I am tired of trying to achieve it. I do not want to be perfect and love my authentic self. Let’s just be real and who we really are, flaws and all, because that’s what makes us unique! Give yourself a break! You are a true queen and wear your freak flag with your crown!
5.) Take some time to stop and smell the roses and for god’s sake stop and look at our beautiful California Sunsets. We are truly blessed to live in such an amazing city where the sunset can leave you breathless, and every time I caught one of these this year, it made me stop and appreciate my life. I will be stopping to see the sunset a lot more in 2017, I can assure you of this.
6.) Play more guitar: YES I used to play all the time. I also write songs and really LOVE music. It is such an outlet for me. I stopped making time for it the last few years and it’s time to change this. I will be back to my rocker chick days before you know it!
7.) Do Not Disturb on my phone: YASSS! This is the best thing I learned from a client in 2016. He puts the do not disturb on his phone when he needs to unplug for a bit. It is perfect, you are at the gym and you do not get any notifications or messages until you take the Do not disturb off. Priceless. Damn it, leave me alone notifications, I will get back to you when I am ready to!
8.) More date nights with my BOO not talking about work. Working with your significant other can be really tough and you tend to bring work home as well as talk about work ALL THE TIME. Last year, Israel and I did not make as much time for real vacations where we were not working, or date nights where we did not talk about work. This year we want to refocus on the things we like to do together besides work and spend more quality time enjoying each others company!
9.) Let it all go and breathe in only the good stuff. Exhale all of the bullshit and close the chapter on anything that is not serving you. It will only keep you up at night if you don’t and frankly I have enough bags and dark circles under my eyes. If you open your mind to positive affirmations and manifestations that is what you will bring into your life. I chose to focus on the good and I want to manifest light and love into my life! No toxic energy here for 2017!
10.) Spend more time working on my craft and honing my skills so I can be better at what I do. It’s important to make time to learn more about your industry so you can be at the top of your game. You can always be better and never settle for where you are now. I want to learn and grow more every day as a person!
11.) Drink more wine and champagne and savor every bit of it because life is short and this makes me happy every time! Sorry not Sorry!
Now lets go out and have the BEST 2017! Go Get them!